Thursday, December 4, 2008

Foot in the mouth

A slip of the tongue or a wrong word in a wrong place can cause havoc. One should be guarded while talking and it is more so with people in prominent positions .some times it can cost them their career as it happened with ex-deputy CM of Maharastra,R.R Patil.Following the26/11 terrorist attack on Mumbai which shook the entire nation he said “Small things like these keep happening in big cities like Mumbai”. The man is shown the door amidst public outcry. After all what he said is not totally untrue. But, the timing and context have made it sound outrageous and intolerable. He made this comment when the nation was reeling under shock and paid the price.
The Kerala C.M,V.S.Achutanandan who had gone to condole the death of slain NSG commando Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan.the C.M was shooed away by the commandos father. Afterwards the C.M reacted by saying that even a dog would not go to their house if it had n’t been for (Major)Sandeep. Is such an outburst warranted from such a senior person? No doubt, he was insulted, but after all, he was an uninvited guest. He rather imposed himself upon the grieving family. The security drill and the hangama preceding C.M’s visit will put off anybody, not to speak about parents who just lost their son in most tragic circumstancesRecently I attended a session on NVC(non-violent communication) at Jiddu Krishna Murty retreat conducted by an American couple. It was an interesting and revealing deals in empathizing with others. as well as one’s own self. surprisingly the expressions we use in our day to day dealings viz-don’t worry, it happened to me once, cheer up,I tell you what, do not constitute empathy. It involves identifying other people’s FEELINGS and their NEEDS. and responding accordingly. in the instant scenario, the feelings are of ,agony, helplessness, anguish and vulnerability. The need is that of support and solidarity. if the old man from Kerala were to ponder for a second to realize the trauma the family was undergoing he would n’t have reacted the way he will do them a world of good to attend a course mentioned aboveto prevent shooting from hip

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